Hard-Ons "Most People Are a Waste of Time" (Bad Taste)
By Dave Schutz
Monday. Jun 12, 1:14 PM
Dude, they are totally old enough to drink now.

I’ll admit that I’m as out of touch with Australia’s Hard-Ons as most American rock fans… which is to say, completely unaware. Which is a bit embarrassing given that their cult status may be described as legendary. But what better time to be introduced to a legendary band than after they’ve been at it for a couple of decades? Well, maybe that doesn’t hold true for U2, but bands that toil in perpetual obscurity tend to ripen with age. They’ve gotta keep working for it.

Most People Are a Waste of Time depicts the band in its 21st year, which would plant it firmly in adulthood, even if they’re still called Hard-Ons. It’s a toss-up. “There Goes One of the Creeps That Hassled My Girlfriend” and “I’m Hurt I’m in Pain” embody a Ramones-like innocence, but other songs indicate that singer Blackie can’t and doesn’t want to write the same old relationship songs. “Bubble Bath” lays out the perils of being dominated on either side of a truly evil instrumental mid-section. “But Officer I Was Just Doing My Job” is a spoken and sung call-and-response number outlining a sexual encounter that sounds explicitly adult for all its playfulness.

Musically, Hard-Ons sound like an old dog stretching some muscles, and I mean that in a completely positive way. They toy with Britpop and jangle-rock techniques without deviating too much from the formula. “What Would Stiv Bators Do” (which sounds a lot like what he would not) kicks off the album by utilizing odd phrasing and a righteous unison vocal/guitar melody to great effect. “Her Smile is a Wish I Can’t Obtain” has an instantly climactic feel not unlike (and I mean this as a compliment too) old Jimmy Eat World, barreling along for its two-minute duration at a constant and blissful apex.

Maybe I’d be cooler if I’d been listening to Hard-Ons for years, but maybe it doesn’t matter. As much as I may have identified with them as a teenager, Most People Are a Waste of Time is identifiable for me now. And who can argue with pop punk that’s okay for adults to listen to?
www.hard-ons.net
www.badtasterecords.se

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Dave Schutz

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